A Reminder

From Haughey’s “Should Anyone Say Forever?”

1. Every commitment is a choice. No one can force you into a commitment. It is a personal choice.

2. Every commitment is a promise.

3. The problem with commitment is not so much making, but keeping them.

4. Being faithful means being fully present in the relational situation in which one finds oneself. We live in a world full of temptation to not be fully present to the people we are with. Being with people requires a presence to give in that moment.

5. Communion is not a state of being that one enters and sleeps in. It is something you need to work hard at again and again.

6. Fidelity involves being willing to generate the ingenuity needed to nurture the communion that is already present (or hoped for).

7. But there are not as many mistaken commitments as there are claims that the commitment was a mistake. There is something happening in the present that they need to face, not in the problem with the past.

8. Withdrawal from a commitment is seldom called for. It is an extreme reaction and rarely a solution to interpersonal distress or communion gone stale. 

9. Finding a problems with the commitment is a handy way of finding a scapegoat and not facing up with the self-absorption that caused the bond between two parties to weaken in the first place.

Thank you for putting Theology in our curriculum, Ateneo.

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